The true Hollywood story of Arnesto Martinez, the famous Taco Bell Dog who's partying habits & lurid lifestyle were infamous & ultimately fatal during the late 90's L.A. "tinseltown" scene.
Toyota Introduces 'The Toy': The First Pedal Car For Adults!
Original Story by Tom Attea of NewsLaugh.com
In an effort to rescue drivers from the high cost of gasoline, Toyota has announced the introduction of the Toy, the first car for grownups that is operated like a child's pedal car.
Its main benefit is, of course, that it requires no gas. There is, however, a limit as to how far the vehicle can travel on one adult’s leg power.
The resourceful auto giant maintains that the encumbrance is not a drawback at all, because adults can change places at the wheel. While one pedals, the other can rest.
The company also proclaims that the new car is the first that “conditions you while you drive.” As a result, it claims that the vehicle will benefit all purchasers with improved heart health, greater longevity and, most vital of all, increased energy to pedal all the farther. Just be sure to pack some extra deodorant.
“We view the Toy as our most advanced product,” the chairman of Toyota avowed. “It’s way out in front of even our own hybrids in term of fuel efficiency, and it saves a lot of steps in the production of ethanol. Now, drivers need only eat enough corn and soy beans to generate energy to propel the vehicle.”
One of the first owners of the Toy was ecstatic. “I can’t tell you how good it feels to pedal past a gas station and know you no longer have to pull in and empty your wallet. But pedaling for miles can take some getting used to. When I work up a sweat, I’m really happy that the Toy comes with air conditioning. I just reach out and start cranking the dashboard-mounted fan. ”
Go go elbow grease!
Just imagine the looks your friends, your potential dates & people on the highway will give you when you pull up in this!
KRAPSODY MAKES NO REPRESENTATIONS ABOUT THE SUITABILITY, RELIABILITY, AVAILABILITY, TIMELINESS, AND/OR ACCURACY OF THE INFORMATION, SOFTWARE, PRODUCTS, SERVICES AND RELATED MATERIALS CONTAINED ON THIS SITE FOR ANY PURPOSE. ALL SUCH INFORMATION, SOFTWARE, PRODUCTS, SERVICES AND RELATED GRAPHICS ARE PROVIDED "AS IS" WITHOUT WARRANTY OF ANY KIND.
User furthermore agrees to defend, indemnify, and hold harmless Krapsody, its officers, directors, employees, agents, third parties, clowns, midgets, chickens and raccoons for any losses, costs, liabilities and expenses (including reasonable attorneys' fees) relating to or arising out of your use of the service, including any breach by you of the terms of this outlined Disclaimer.
Financial support for Krapsody is provided entirely by its webmaster, and these pages carry no paid advertising of any kind. Indeed, Krapsody looks somewhat askance upon other sites who insist upon selling their own readers to a corporate entity to make a buck.
Yes, I know this is an antiquated view and not terribly in keeping with these modern times. But I'm simply not greedy enough to sell your eyes for the advertising revenue, however lucrative it may be.
However, Krapsody may change any part of this limited disclaimer at any time with or without consent, notice or warning. If the money bundle is large enough I would sell my left nut and the hand-knit shawl off my grandmother's back.
If this should bother the user, user should take this Disclaimer and put it where the sun does not shine.
In general, legally speaking, it would probably be best if you didn't look at any of these web-pages at all.
No warranties, express or implied, have been made for this product's usage or fitness for any specific task. Purchaser agrees to all terms given on the lease when they open the sealed disk-envelope or set eyes upon these pages. Children under the age of four should not be allowed to inhale this product. Do not place contents over your head or else baldness or reproductive sterility may result.
This product is not designed to endure sudden changes in humidity unless you are dousing it with copious amounts of alcohol which result in subsequent dehydration and hair of the dog syndrome in which case give us another drink won't you?
Do not stick your fingers in the gears or grab the saw blade while it is still moving. Eye shielding should be worn at all times. Keep this product refrigerated. Do not expose to direct sunlight. Do not exceed recommended dosage. For external use only.
I take no responsibility for anything contained herein part, stated or implied. This advice has been ignored by 45225 people who don't "get it".
If you fall into that category, try reading the FAQ.
Here is a complete disaster.... I mean, a Complete And Really Thorough Disclaimer for Krapsody readers. Pay special attention to the small print.
ALL CHARACTERS AND EVENTS ON THIS SITE ARE FICTIONAL AND HAVE NO RELATION TO ANY REAL PERSONS, LIVING OR DEAD. And yet, somehow, they still do. But by Dickens it's in the public domain. The Opinions Expressed here do not Necessarily Reflect Those of a Rational Mind. In addition the author is prone to ramble a lot.
Before relying on the material accessed from Krapsody, users should carefully evaluate its accuracy, currency, completeness, relevance for their purposes, and should obtain appropriate professional advice relevant to their circumstances.
Krapsody includes information provided by third parties and in some cases a fourth party, it's all one big party. So party on Wayne. Material provided by ANY parties has not been independently verified or validated. So don't give us krap if it's wrong. Additionally, no warranty either expressed or implied as to the use, accuracy or completeness of any materials provided or accessed from Krapsody is available to any user of the krap contained herein.
Krapsody is not for everyone. Clinical tests show that Krapsody may cause nausea, fatigue, cognitive dysfunction, and kidney or liver problems. Ask your doctor if Krapsody is right for you.