Happy Birthday to Me Happy Birthday to Me Happy Birthday to Me Happy Birthday to Me Happy Birthday to Me Happy Birthday to Me Happy Birthday to Me


Friends romans countrymen lend me your bank accounts. I am kajillion years old this Tuesday June 24th!

I've never felt younger in a pair of depends undergarments. Why I feel like I could... *cough cough hack hack* keel over and die any second...

But not until I've partied like it was 1999 in my birthday suit. Feel free to oil me up, sing me a birthday song, shower me with gifts, provide me with a chest waxing and stuff me with birthday cake (sans the candles, a kajillion candles would not fit on it, even if it was as big as Texas, Jennifer Lopez's butt, or Mick Jagger's lips put together, you get the picture).

Meh, just say hi if you care to!

WEEEEEE!

Birthday Fire
p.s. don't forget a fire extinguisher.


8 Comments:

Gorilla Bananas said...

When a man gets to your age it's time to try out a pair nipple clamps before he dies.

Bridget said...

Your looking good for your age and take a picture of those nipple clamps if you try them out! :D

Sogeshirtsguy said...

happy birthday static don't get too creative with those candles.

Lord Likely said...

Many happy (belated) returns of the day, good sir!

In dog years you'd be dead, don't you know.

Happy birthday!

Sully Sullivan said...

Happy Birthday, muchacho. Don't break a hip celebrating. Break your dick instead.

Booya said...

Happy bday dude!! Sorry I was late for the event did you set the nursing home on fire? lol

Jack Payne said...

Happy Birthday, Static. Insanity becomes you. It, no doubt, accounts mightily for your youthful looks.

Get Bent said...

Happy birthday to you, my blog was just born

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