Showing posts with label flying spaghetti monster. Show all posts
Showing posts with label flying spaghetti monster. Show all posts

Ten Things God Would Die For

jesus christ not you again"When his life was ruined, his family killed, his farm destroyed, Job knelt down on the ground and yelled up to the heavens, "Why god? Why me?" and the thundering voice of God answered, "There's just something about you that pisses me off."
- Stephen King

Mar 05, 2009

Retardeau, France (Krapsody)- A flashback to an article I published last year as a guest blogger on the now defunct Cult of Qelqoth. I examined what the Pope's visit to France brought in the way of spiritual enlightenment.

Is God appalled at the primitive, downright heretical, nature of our prayers? Does God truly have mercy on us? Will God save humanity once again? These questions and more have finally been answered here - your direct port to the Almighty.

Do Dinosaurs Believe in Christians?

Sun, Mar 23, 2008

Easter Island (Krapsody) - Since Easter is here once again, what better time than to ask another burning question that has been on the minds of great thinkers from far and wide - this occurred to me as I stumbled across a lengthy, quarrelsome and hilarious discussion on regarding whether or not Christians believe in dinosaurs. In lieu of challenging logically unanswerable questions answered with meaningless statements, I've decided to turn the tables and ask: Do dinosaurs believe in Christians?

Bowling With Jesus

Today I came across a new group discussion by pointlessbanter at about the amount of religious fervor on the site and the web as a whole, this one was aptly titled Jesus Christ.
Which was followed this afternoon by The Removal of Religious Topics from BlogCatalog Discussions posted by NINE. Damn censorship! That's a shame as there were some good points raised so far. But who needs all the hostility?

Life is fun, I'm going bowling with Jesus.

That's hot. I didn't know Jesus even liked bowling...

I still think religious fundamentalism/fanaticism is a mental disorder. Just look at George W. Bush, Osama Bin Laden or Tom Cruise.

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Examine the statistics for yourself;

Search Results 1 - 10 of about 48,200,000 for religion V. Search Results 1 - 10 of about 49,100,000 for humor on Google groups? I think that says people are looking for laughs more than they are spiritual enlightenment. Aren't the two kind of intertwined?

Who knows, maybe the path to enlightenment are laughs? I don't see how being so uptight or narrow-minded about a belief system is going to make things any better in the world. Nor is censorship in the name of "being afraid of offending anyone". It just influences people to think they are better than others.

On that note: People looking for the ultimate truth on Google groups are a bunch of poopy farty pants.

The Sixth Dimension, The Invention of Cheese and the Flying Spaghetti Monster?

One of the more humorous things I find in life is people who claim to be "in the know" of things. Nothing says pretentious more than someone who acts like an expert on any given subject, especially on the internet.

It's not only pretentious. It's annoying. Anyone with a computer can incessantly ramble on about their beliefs and publish it nowadays (just look at me).

There are plenty of reasons why someone could be considered a professional in their field. But when that field is so unfounded and mysterious such as the paranormal or metaphysical - whether science may offer an explanation or not - is ridiculous.

Extraordinary claims! Astounding insights! I wanna see some ectoplasmic vomit then I'll truly believe.

Take for example this bloggers description of the sixth dimension.

Now, I'm sure there likely is a series of dimensions beyond our human comprehension and understanding. That being said, I don't think anyone's claims could be necessarily be construed for fact or truth. The mysterious universe is probably just that and to think that we might have all the answers is ludicrous.

I'm not saying that I don't believe that these things are possible. Our thoughts have a way of manifesting themselves into our physical realm. For instance, great inventions like electricity, the automobile, and cheese would not have been possible if someone hadn't thought to themselves, 'Why that's a great idea!'

The main point here is think it, believe it and it will happen. Maybe.

Everyone of course is entitled to their own brand of bigotry. We're all bigots to some extent about something. Regardless if that's right or if we agree with that or not.

So just because the religious norm in western culture and the mainstream beliefs of it's adherents may have effed up some of our fragile little psyches concerning new age or other mystical spiritual beliefs doesn't mean every person that has religious or spiritual beliefs (or horrors) and publicly expresses them has a screw loose.

But I tend to think anyone who makes claims that they found the truth through pure speculation just might be a total wingnut...especially if they are wearing tinfoil on their heads.

Who knows, maybe there is a millionth dimension and our spiritual doubles carry on in everyday life similar to our own, and they believe in Pastafarianism and the Flying Spaghetti Monster?

In closing, the slogan for the sixth dimension should be:

The sixth dimension.
It's cooler than the third dimension. Yeah!
It's like... the third dimension, only different.
It's the third dimension squared!

Talk about a mindfuck, huh?

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